Freaky Friday

Friday, February 10, 2012

Hey guys!

I did something I NEVER do this morning: I slept in. I'm usually super strict about wake up time because I like to get an hour of work in before the rest of the house wakes up. But my son woke up in the night and after dealing with him I came back to bed and switched off my alarm. Then, I woke up roughly 10 minutes before my daughter's bus comes and everyone else was still sound asleep. So I am completely off schedule and that's weird for me. I've basically spent the morning eating brownies, watching Youtube clips and being generally unproductive. It's completely thrown me off.

But I DID get some freakiness together. So I would say that I got the important stuff done. Brownie eating and Freaky Friday are pretty high at the top of the list.

K, so I watched Kourtney and Kim Take New York and Kim wore this jacket in tan for basically every interview portion. Look, I can understand a little shoulder pad. I don't mind a stronger shoulder. I do mind looking like an alien overlord.

These could be the ugliest pants ever, but they're missing a drop crotch. So they're only like, the second ugliest pair of pants ever. And seriously, whaddup with those ace bandage shoes?

This is basically what my fishing rod looks like after my husband takes me fishing and I spend an hour messing around with the reel and getting yelled at.

My husband is super serious about his fishing. I'm super serious about laying on the boat and reading Cosmo, It's basically a perfect marriage.

HAHA I found this in my FF folder on my computer and I have no idea how or why it got in there but it is EXCELLENT. "He'll look so great his Grandma won't recognize him" might be the best slogan of all time. Almost as cool as dressing your son up as a tiny swinger.

Corinna sent me this little gem. Ugh, I know that I'll catch some flack for saying this, but is there anything more annoying than women who want to make a point with breastfeeding. Yay I'm so excited your have breasts and can feed your baby, can I go back to not caring now? I breastfed both of my kids -- do you know who didn't know that? Everyone ever. Because I don't feel the need to use my baby or my boobs to make a point about anything.

But maybe it's because I didn't have this hat. Heaven forbid I wouldn't get to make a point with my boob hidden behind my nursing baby!

Also, I guarantee -- GUARANTEE -- your baby doesn't want to dress up as a giant nipple. Like, I promise this will become a sore spot when he's 16.

Yes, that's right. You're look at a $100 high-fashion fanny pack. Remember when Sex and the City tried to make fanny packs cool again? It's so awkward. Although, my dad (my BIKER dad who has been known to rock a fanny pack) will be thrilled that they're back. So handy!

Brittney sent over these beauts. See that red sole? Yeah, these are Louboutins. Torturous, torturous Louboutins. The more I look at these the more I feel the need to wear flip flops.

My dear friend Manda sent these to me and they have haunted my dreams ever since. And you thought Vibrams were bad!

Meleah sent me an entire article about trends that we wish would never come back. This one was listed as shorts so short the pockets hang out. Can we change that to "Shorts so short that the pockets hang out worn with the world's ugliest Uggs and bad extensions while having a complete mental breakdown?" I think that is more comprehensive and accurate.

Of course, Britney Spears is totally my guilty pleasure so I can't be too mean.

Both Wendy and Kimberly sent me these, which means they were doubly offensive. On the bright side, they really highlight your gluteus maximus... LITERALLY. HA...ha..............ha.

I don't want to live on this planet anymore.

Alright, I need to go back to being unproductive again. After last week's dalliance with whiplash, I'm staying away from trampolines for the weekend and am planning to go see The Vow tomorrow because I'm girly like that. The reviews were terrible, which is a surefire way to categorize it as a movie that I will thoroughly enjoy and/or sob through. YAY.


Krista said...

I was at American Eagle the other day and they are selling short shorts with the pockets hanging out and the pockets have silver stars on them, I guess to make them cuter! Whatever!

Janelle Southern said...

I have a friend who is actually knitting boob hats. But she's from Germany and I'm sure that explains it all. Plus, she's really crazy.

Jae said...

Krista, I feel like it's even worse because then it's manufactured cutoffs! Not even real ones. Booo!

Janelle, oh those Germans. Nipple hats... who knew?

Manda said...

I am glad those haunted you as much as they did me. Plus you just made me super famous for mentioning me on your blog. Best day ever! Go eat another brownie for me!

jen said...

i really love your friday posts! those ballet heels are torturously intriguing.

Brandi said...

lol..made me laugh

Jenny said...

Hahaha, I totally saw that boob hat on Pinterest...along with those horrible feet shoes. Thanks for this great post!
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